50/50

 Bacon.

Slater's 50/50 is a burger restaurant that is in a love affair with bacon. The burger patty is made of 50% beef and 50% bacon. Baconception.

The menu features some wacky burger creations, including the "Peanut butter and Jellousy." That sandwich is exactly what you guessed it is.

Fried chicken on flapjacks with bacon

Another (more popular) option is the "Design It" menu. One uses a golf pencil to select a burger patty, bun, and toppings on a paper menu. The highlight of this activity is naming your creation. Be warned, you may forget your clever burger name and force the server to become increasingly irritated as she has to yell out, "I'm a Jersey Shore fan," over and over again. The cleverest amongst us named his burger his own name. No confusion as to who this belongs to.

We had a large party (18 people) and they wouldn't take reservations. We waited an hour and 20 minutes to be seated (on a Saturday afternoon). There is a bar which is first come, first serve. We hung out there for a long time while we waited. The bar also has the full menu, so eating there is a good option if the wait is long.

They have a ton of beers. However, all of them are written in different colored chalk on a board suspended from the ceiling. I could not read half of them.

I ordered the "Eat Your Veggies" burger and found it tasted too much like vegetables (I know). Not good vegetables, but like, wheat grass. Shiver.

One in our party ordered this bacon brownie

I also tasted some of the fried pickles. They were good, but a novelty. I couldn't eat more than two (and an order contains one million). The sweet potato fries, however, come with a heavenly pumpkiny dipping sauce. I ate all of the sweet potato fries.

If you're going to Slater's 50/50, prepare for wacky, novelty food and don't try to create something 'normal.' You're better off diving head first into this bacon-infused experience (when in Rome (order bacon)).

Katella Deli

Ever dreamed of being Jewish? Yes you have. Mmm. Matzo, Passover, lentils… Livin’ the life.

As my father is Jewish I have some experience in the ethnic food aisle of the grocery store. Eww, not with gefilte fish, gross. That stuff gives me the creeps. The extent of my Jewish cultured-ism leads to latkes (that’s potato pancakes in goy (non-Jewish guy (you need to brush up on your Yiddish))).

Latkes are tastier than they appear

My dad makes the best latkes. No restaurant can come close, but whenever I am out and I see them on the menu I have to give them a go. Especially since this is Orange County and there are maybe 30 Jews living here. So latkes are few and far between in these parts.

Ethnic food is ethnic

Every once in a while I will go with my grandma or uncle and aunt to Katella Deli in Los Alamitos to restock on my Jew gamma rays. You didn’t know we had those? Oh, yeah. It’s WONDERFUL. We’re the chosen people.

Someone couldn't wait for me to take a picture

The restaurant is huge and super popular for brunch (they serve breakfast all day). They have a little bakery/deli counter attached and it’s adorable. Bagel chips are highly recommended. Oh my gosh, NO. Bagel chips are not old bagel poops. You’re gross. But, I can see why you’d think that. Misleading name…

The menu is home to lots of classic ethnic dishes and regular old brunch-type meals. You know what bums me out? Yeah, Full House is off the air. That’s a bummer. I wonder what Michelle is up to. But also, the latkes are listed as, “Potato Pancakes.” Are we dumbing down our culture for the general public? Yes. Yes, is the answer.

“Latkes? What the crap is that? Sounds icky.” Or “Potato Pancakes. Delightful! I’ll take 100 million, please.” I get it. It’s just a bummer. I know like three Jewish words: Goy, Latke, and Jewish. I want to prove to the other nice Jewish people that I’m one of them! I know your language! Let me in your super secret club! Give me the gamma rays! Make me a professional comedian/doctor/lawyer/producer.

How were my potato pancakes? Disappointing. Dad’s are way better. But it’s always nice to visit Katella Deli.

Jolly Holiday Bakery Cafe

"Oh, it's a jolly holiday with Mary
No wonder that it's Mary that we love!
Now then what'd be nice
We'll start with raspberry ice
And then some cakes and tea
Order what you will
There'll be no bill
It's complimentary"

"May I take your coat?"

That’s right, Disney drew inspiration from a tiny part of a movie made almost 50 years ago to create a brand new themed restaurant: the Jolly Holiday Bakery Café! Is it a bakery? Yes. Is it a café? Yes. Is it complimentary? No. WHAT?! Liars!

This place is practically perfect in every way. It fits right into Main Street. It’s hard to imagine that it hasn’t been there since Marry Poppins was the latest and greatest thing to come out of their production company. This bakery/café is the restaurant we never knew Disneyland was missing.

Designed by my friend’s mother (yeah, I know people), the Mary Poppins inspired restaurant is simple, adorable, and full of great details that subtly contribute to the ambiance. PENGUIN. STAINED. GLASS.

It looks just like the REAL fake Matterhorn!

It’s another stand-in-line-then-order-then-take food-with-you-to-table-style establishments. But, while one stands in line, one can look at the glistening case full of special sweets that are only available here. Matterhorn Macaroon? Yeah, okay!

It’s a basic café menu: Soups, Salads, & Sandwiches. But, new to Disneyland is this restaurant's seasonal menu. Some of the items will be year round, but others will rotate through.

Unfortunately, it is still theme park food. But, with a spoon full of sugar…

According to my sources, this is a coincidence.

Loving Hut

The evil vegan orders her lunch.

Once upon a time, a mommy and daddy yam-shrimp noticed how empty their yam-shrimp-house was and wanted very badly to have a baby. On a beautiful ocean day, their little yam-shrimp was born. They loved him very much and they named him Christopher. Christopher was the nicest yam-shrimp in his class. One day he was playing fin-ball in the yard when an evil vegan yam-shrimp-napped him. He screamed for the vegan not to hurt him. The vegan ignored Christopher. He cried as he accepted the inevitable – that he would never see his parents again. The vegan had a tasty lunch.

Wait a second. Yam-shrimps are made from yams! Christopher must be a shrimp-shrimp.

That means, when I go to the Loving Hut Restaurant in Orange, I won’t eat anyone’s son or daughter!

The Orange 'Chicken'

Located in the middle of a strip mall on Tustin, the Loving Hut is serving FANTASTIC 100% vegan cuisine. I mean, AMAZING. My favorite is the orange ‘chicken,’ but I haven’t disliked anything I’ve tried. I‘m a little wary of the philly cheese steak. How the heck do they make that vegan? I think maybe they use magic to make their ‘meat’ seem so meat-like.

I’m okay with eating magic: As long as I’m not eating Christopher.

Photo Credit - Bert Brown

Food Trucks

I want the one with the mostest fruitests.

One day I’d like to see a movie version of a food fight escalate to the point where a food truck crashes through the wall - just a dream I have.

Food trucks are neat. I like them mostly because the portions are small enough to taste lots of different things. I think restaurants should allow me to choose several different entrees to have tastes of instead of having to commit to one. I’m indecisive.

Fullerton has a few food trucks hang out downtown on Tuesday nights from 5pm – 9pm.

Fun Fact: Not all trucks serve food.

My friend, Bert, and I investigated. (He’s somewhat of a food truck expert as this is the SECOND truck-based dining event he’s taken me to.)

We got there around 8:30pm and some of the trucks were closing up or had left.

We did get to have some herbivore fries at the OC Food Truck. And Bert got a lychee berry drinky thingy that was way delicious.

I was really looking forward to getting snacks at the Bakery Truck, but they closed up.

I will definitely go back – but earlier in the evening.

Oh, and FYI, if you’re into food trucks like Bert, he recommends the iPhone app: Truxmap. Pretty cool.

Bruxie

Have you ever found yourself staring into your refrigerator at the contents of a fantastic sandwich only to remember that you’re out of bread? What do you do in that situation? Do you give up on the sandwich pipe-dream? HECK NO. You improvise. “Maybe I could use a tortilla instead of bread, or I could cut all the ingredients up and make a salad-y thing. Oh, do I have any frozen bagels?”

I believe the founders of Bruxie the restaurant were once in this very situation. You know what they use for bread on their sandwiches? WAFFLES!

The Bruxie Burger

Bruxie is, according to the website, “A new take on the authentic Belgium Waffle. The "Bruxie" is unlike any waffle offered: the Bruxie is light, crisp, yeasty and not sweet. It's street food that's perfect for breakfast, lunch, mid day snack as well as a dessert or late night treat.”

Boy, do they have that last part right. There is ALWAYS a line at this sandwich stand. Most line placeholders are Chapman Students, as the restaurant is directly across the street from the school. The quality of these treats, however, is not that of top ramen, mac & cheese, or any other college staple. These are GOURMET waffle sandwiches. For example, these are some of the ‘savory’ options: Prosciutto & Gruyere, Smoked Salmon & Dill Cream Cheese, and Sun-Dried Tomatoes & Goat Cheese. That last one is my favorite. 

They also have sweet Bruxies: Nutella and banana

OH, and these guys MAKE their own soda: Delicious cane sugar sodas. Yum.

AND, despite this being an “order here” “pick up here” kind of place, the service is unbelievable. They really take hospitality to a new level. IE my friend wasn’t crazy about what he ordered. The owner (I’m guessing) INSISTED that he replace the sandwich.

Blythe Hill (photographer), Jordan Sabolick, Kc Wayland, and I left feeling happy and satisfied.

Hotdog Cart

As I’ve been stuck in Fashion Island, Newport Beach, non-stop for the past month (working at my mom’s gift-wrapping store), I thought I’d provide you with insider knowledge on the only geek-friendly area in the mall.

The hotdog cart.

It may look like just a regular old hotdog cart, but, notice, it’s mere feet away from… THE APPLE STORE.

That’s right, if you find yourself forced into Fashion Island, you, too can make this your little slice of geekdom.

The hotdogs are actually phenomenal and incredibly reasonable. They’re maybe the only thing one can buy for less than a 5er in the entire mall. Plus, they have tofu dogs!

"We'll keep you entertained for a moment!"

Fashion Island used to have little carts all over the place. However, a few months ago, Nordstrom rolled into the mall and insisted the carts skedaddle. What a diva. The only cart permitted to remain? Hotdogs. Yeah.

A few stores up and you’ll discover a lovely koi pond.

There you go, a geek’s guide to Fashion Island.

Enjoy.

Natraj Cuisine of India

That guy might be a nerd...

Is Indian food considered geeky? I don’t know, but I had to write about this restaurant.

My friends Sean and Sam took me to Natraj Cuisine of India in Belmont Shore. I’ve only had Indian food maybe twice before, but this was AMAZING.

Sean and Sam are regulars at this restaurant and thus are treated like royalty. We were warmly greeted by the owner the moment we walked in. The warm ‘hello’s continue from every staff member we came across.

Natraj is a little bit of a hole-in-the-wall (my favorite kind of hole (I know)). The restaurant is quiet and dark and warm and fresh. The décor is not too cheesy: There is a wall mural of the Taj Mahal, but, c’mon, isn’t that standard practice?

We ordered a plethora of vegetarian dishes. As well as some rice and garlic naan. SO GOOD. And, because Sean and Sam are on 'the list', we got to share a complimentary frozen cheesy piece of heaven. Then the owner came back over to us and wanted to make sure I, specifically, was satisfied.

So, after your love interest agrees to a second date (since you took him/her to The Library for coffee on your first date), take him/her to Natraj Cuisine of India and relish in the, “You know all the good places,” compliments you are sure to receive.